A Permission Slip for Leaders This Back-to-School Season

The back-to-school season feels magical. The sense of renewal every August or September as educators and students shift gears from summer to fall, with fresh notebooks, sharpened pencils, and the buzz of opportunity filling the air. It's when classrooms come alive with student voices, hallways echo with energy, and leaders at every level balance preparation with anticipation.

From my role as a classroom teacher to a building leader, district administrator, and now as an external community builder, one truth remains constant—this season is a mix of excitement and pressure.

That’s why I want to offer you something I wish I had given myself years ago: a permission slip.

Permission Slip #1: Let Go of the Myth of the Perfect Start

No matter what role you have, you have a picture and idea about how each new school year is going to play out. The first day will be seamless. The systems you put in place will run smoothly. Your staff will feel energized. The students will be engaged. The vision will unfold exactly as planned.

But the real truth—and unspoken reality is there will be bumps along the way, and some days the ride might be a bit bumpier than others.

The copier will jam. Technology will crash. The schedule will shift at the last minute. A child will cry at drop-off. A parent will send a critical email before lunch. By the end of week one, you’ll be juggling a dozen unexpected challenges. All of this is OK.

Let the first six weeks unfold—don’t jump in to fix or adjust so things go exactly as you imagined. Adjusting the plan means you’re leading.

So here’s your first permission slip: let go of the myth of the perfect start.

Permission Slip #2: Notice the Joy

One of the traps we fall into as leaders is focusing so much on what’s not working that we miss the moments of joy.

During my time as a principal, there was a year when the first week of school was especially chaotic. Buses ran late, lunch schedules were disrupted, and I was rushing from one issue to another. At the end of the day, exhausted, I passed by a classroom and stopped. Inside, a teacher was reading aloud to her students, and giggles spilled out into the hallway. In that moment, I realized that despite the chaos, many joyful moments were happening—I had been too caught up in the problems to notice them.

Joy is easy to overlook in the rush, but it’s also what sustains us. As leaders, we need to pause long enough to notice it: the smile from a student, the hug from a colleague, the curiosity in a child’s question, and the quick “thank you” in the hallway.

Here’s your second permission slip: allow yourself to notice the joy.

Permission Slip #3: The Appreciation You Don’t Always See

Another truth about leadership is that appreciation doesn’t always arrive in the form of notes, emails, or public praise. You may not get the daily thank-yous. You may not hear the words of gratitude spoken out loud.

But appreciation is still there.

Some of my favorite memories are when a student would stop by my office just to say, “hello.” On those days when everything felt heavy, I would remind myself that parents entrust you with their child every morning—this is appreciation. Or, the teacher who tries a new strategy because you encouraged them.

The absence of thanks does not mean the absence of value. As educators and education leaders, your work shapes lives in ways you may never fully see, and that “thank you” you so desire may come many years later.

So, here’s your third permission slip: trust that the impact you’re making is real, even if it’s not always verbalized.

Permission Slip #4: Remember to Nourish Yourself

During the back-to-school season, it can feel like you’re carrying the weight of the world. Every system, every staff member, every student, and every parent concern somehow lands on your shoulders.

Because many people look to you for guidance, stability, and answers, it’s essential to stay grounded. One simple practice I try to adopt and live by is this: you don’t have to lead anyone else until you’ve first led yourself.

That means taking care of your own well-being by recognizing when to pause, breathe, reset, and attend to your needs. Self-care isn’t selfish; it’s strategic. Leaders who neglect themselves risk burnout, which affects not only them but everyone they support.

Self-care starts with the simple stuff: drink water, eat lunch away from your desk now and then. I’ve found great success in guarding boundaries and committing to doing something enjoyable outside of work. Trust me, your leadership will be stronger because of it.

Your fourth permission slip is simple: nourish yourself.

Permission Slip #5: Be present

It’s easy to get caught up in the operational details of leadership—schedules, budgets, initiatives, and data. All of that is important, but it’s not the core of your work. You’re not just managing systems; you’re shaping lives.

I’ve had to learn first-hand that how you show up is just as important as the tasks you tackle. The words you pick, the tone you set, and how you remain calm amid chaos—all of these shape the experiences of those around you.

When the task list becomes too long, the schedule seems impossible, or the number of urgent matters feels overwhelming, focus on that inner voice of calm and remember that your ability to stay steady, kind, and authentic will influence your school community more than any perfect plan ever could.

Here’s your fifth permission slip: leadership is less about control and more about being present.

Permissions Slips in Action

So, how do you actually live this out in the hustle of back-to-school? Here are a few simple practices that have worked for me and for leaders I’ve coached:

1. Start meetings with gratitude. Ask your team to share one positive moment from the week. It shifts the energy and reminds everyone of the “why.”

2. Build reflection time into your calendar. Even 10 minutes at the end of the day to jot down what went well can reframe your perspective.

3. Identify your “joy triggers.” For me, it was walking into classrooms. Find the moments that refill your energy and seek them intentionally.

4. Lean on your network. Have a trusted peer or mentor you can text after a hard day just to say, “That was rough.” Don’t isolate yourself.

5. Practice saying no. Protect your focus. Not every initiative or request deserves your immediate yes.

Permission for the Whole Year

While I’ve framed this as a back-to-school message, the truth is that these permission slips apply all year long. Education leadership is a marathon, not a sprint. The seasons will change, the pressures will shift, but the core reminders remain the same:

• You don’t have to be perfect.

• Joy is happening, so don’t miss it.

• Appreciation is real, even when unspoken.

• Self-care fuels leadership.

• You are shaping lives, not just managing systems.

As you start this new school year, remember to carry these permission slips with you. Post them on your desk. Share them with your team. Remind yourself often that your worth isn’t based on perfect performance, but on your presence, resilience, and heart.

Leadership is demanding but also deeply human. When you doubt yourself, keep in mind: you don’t have to do everything perfectly. Just show up as yourself.

Because the most powerful gift you can give your school community this year is you.

Photo at top by Allison Shelley for EDUimages, CC BY-NC 4.0